Not In a Hurry

“Not in a hurry…” These words echoed so clearly in my spirit this morning as soon as my feet hit the floor. I thought it was just random song lyrics stuck in my head. I even sang them as I waited for my coffee to brew, thinking, “Maybe I’ll listen to that song later today.” And I did- because it is in fact lyrics in several different songs, but it’s also so much more than that.

If I can be completely honest with you, (and that’s all I’m ever going to be here) I’m coming out of a pretty difficult few months. One I’ve grown accustomed to calling the Wilderness- and I’m aware that this is only one phase of many in the Wilderness… 2025 was an amazing year and also a difficult year. There was a LOT of change in my life; some outwardly in roles and relationships and things, but mostly inwardly… in who I am, who I was, and who I thought I would be. I’ve heard the Lord more clearly and consistently in the past year than I ever have in my life, and learning to lean in to and listen for His voice is a precious process that I’m so grateful for. There’s also a lot that comes with that. Deciding what noises and voices in my life need to be removed in order to hear His more clearly comes with that. Sitting rather than serving sometimes has to come with that. Recognizing lies when I hear them and giving them no room in my mind and heart comes with that. Yearning for His next word while still contemplating HIs current word comes with that. And waiting comes with that. A lot of waiting. Because as we so often say, God doesn’t work within our time frame. Rather, He stands completely outside of it altogether. And so when He speaks, how frequent/infrequent that is, what it requires, what it means, where it leads… involves waiting.

Waiting is not something that most people would say they are great at doing. Myself included, though I’ve walked with the Lord long enough to have become much better at it than I used to be, though it still poses a challenge most times. In May of last year, the Lord required of me to hand over to Him a role and a position that I loved with all of my heart. I knew exactly what He was alluding to as soon as He began touching the subject. And so I relinquished that love of mine to Him, and I waited. I waited on how to tell those I loved. I waited for the how to leave it and when to leave it, because there’s a right and wrong way to do those things, even when you know it’s the Lord leading you to it. And then once I fully handed it over… I waited some more. Not that I didn’t have anything to do- He graciously allowed no gaps in my employment status and also barely any difference in pay by giving me the opportunity to do something else I love equally as much full time in place of what I gave Him. But a different kind of waiting. The Holy Spirit told me very precisely, “Don’t just fill your schedule back up with where that role used to be. Let me do it.” To which I said, “Okay” but constantly had to put the pen down and back away from the planner because the temptation to do just that- busy up my life all over again with all the things- was very real for me. So I leaned in to a slower pace of life for the second half of 2025. A less busy, less running everywhere for everybody doing all the things. And with less comes more. More time to study Scripture. More time to write. More time to read. More time to rest. Not like a “do nothing” kind of rest but like a “sit back against Him and breathe” kind of rest. Because sometimes you don’t realize how long you’ve been holding your breath until He gives you the ability to let it go.

My “yes” in May of last year was one of many to the Lord after His first words of the year were, “You can’t take it with you” and, “It’s going to cost you.” Some of those were easy and some were excrutiating. Some things I didn’t want to take with me, and some of the costs seemed like far more than I could pay. Again, when we hear His voice… we don’t often understand the magnitude of His words until much later. Throughout the latter half of the year, He continued speaking. Some things I was so excited to hear, and some things were crushing. There was a stillness that rested over my life that I almost can’t explain. He continued opening doors of teaching and leading, two things that I love and know I’m called to do, but overall, life felt still. There were many days that I woke up with a full schedule, only for everything on it to be changed or cancelled, leaving me in stillness. There were days of getting up before the sun to come sit in stillness to see what or if He would say anything new that day… and I would wait. I’m not going to gloss up a picture that isn’t that glossy- I did not wait well, often. Even today, the urge to hurry would have likely kept me from even being still enough to hear this word from Him and relay it on this platform. Last night I almost planned to get up this morning and hit the ground running doing other things today, but His still small voice reminded me that I don’t “have to” live that way. Part of His refining process in my life has been pulling back things I thought I “had” to do or things I thought I “had” to be, and busy is one of those things. We wear busyness like a badge of honor, but busyness has never equated to fruitfulness. Sometimes the most honorable, frutiful thing we can do is sit down and listen, and He has not only taught me that discipline but also, to love it. To love sitting with Him. To love listening for Him. Because how we do what He tells us is just as important, oftentimes even more so, than why we do it. We can obey with a bitter heart and still miss everything He says.

From October through the end of 2025, the Wilderness got real….well… wild. There was battle after battle. Warfare intensified. Relationships got rocky. Many days the stilllness didn’t feel like a sweet place of surrender but rather an endless obstacle to whatever would come next, which just had to be better than what I was in at the time. Though I still sat. Sometimes begrudgingly, through teary eyes and gritted teeth. Sometimes I sat distracted. Sometimes I sat but not while seeking out His voice but rather seeking out something I thought I might could do to end this slow and still season and move on… only to no avail. Opportunities or good ideas would come, and His answer would be “No, not yet.” In October and several times last year He had said, “This is only the beginning.” But then, nothing. Or what felt like nothing. When we talk about God “not being in a hurry” or having “different timing” than us, it’s usually in reference to something we are wanting from Him. Just like I wanted to fastfoward through the still and slow to see what was next, we often expect God to give or do something to us or on our behalf, and the “hurry” we mention is that He isn’t doing it fast enough for our liking. But that’s not all the hurry is about.

This morning as “not in a hurry” played through my thoughts, I came to my little makeshift upper room area where I sit every morning, and I looked played a couple of the songs surrounding this phrase, and I’m so thankful for the power of praise and how God uses music to speak… but after that, it’s as though Holy Spirit downloaded this entire stream of thoughts regarding those words. Because He isn’t in a hurry… not to do or fulfill to us what we want Him to do, but also… He’s not hurrying us. I know, I know- just Hear me out. If you are actively in known disobedience to the Lord, there is a hurry and a compulsion to repent and return to Him. Romans 2:4 tells us that His kindness leads us to repentance. He is patient and longsuffering with us, and in turn we should be quick to repent, return, forgive, love, etc. because of how graciously He offers us those things. So as far as disobedience is concerned, He is “hurrying” you away from it and back into fellowship with Himself because of His love and concern for you. That’s not what I mean.

As I was whispering the words, “You’re not in a hurry” this morning, He said, “Do you know that I’m not hurrying you, either?” “I don’t hurry your healing. I don’t hurry your learning. I don’t hurry you when you don’t understand what I’m doing. I don’t hurry you through hard emotions. I don’t hurry you to just consume more Scripture because you think you have to in January and I don’t hurry you to start a fast just because others are doing it. I don’t hurry you because I know your capacity. I don’t hurry you because I know that the furnace is hot, the battle is fierce, and the warfar is real. I don’t hurry you because I know you can’t see everything I see and you don’t know everything I know. I don’t hurry you because just as I often don’t respond when you wish I would or the way you want Me to, I still do respond, and I know you will, too. I don’t hurry you because what I’m doing in you is holy, and you don’t have to hurry what is holy.” 🥹😭

“You don’t have to hurry what is holy.” A short little phrase that is wrecking me today. He doesn’t necessarily honor our busyness. He doesn’t necessarily pat us on the back for being “in ministry” or for exhausting ourselves at the expense of our own wellbeing. He doesn’t reward what is rushed- He reward’s what is obedient. He rewards who is obedient. He DOES honor what is holy and He DOES commend us for seeking Him, leaning in to hear from Him, and waiting on Him. He doesn’t hurry what is holy, because He’s aware of what is hard. Sometimes we are far too harsh with ourselves. We hurry ourselves and therefore assume that He is hurrying us too- but He isn’t. When I gave myself a hard time for struggling to hand Him something I love, God wasn’t hurrying me. When I grieved parts of myself that have died over the last 2 years of walking with Him and allowing Him to prune and purify me, God wasn’t hurrying me. When I’ve sat patiently in stillness and when I’ve staggered begrudgingly through it, God wasn’t hurrying me. When I’ve wrestled with His calling because what I knew spiritually and what I saw physically were not the same, God wasn’t hurrying me. The same kindness that leads me to repentance also leads me to savor the surrender, not the thing I’m surrendering. The same kindness that leads me to repentance also leads me to His grace in the grief. The same kindness that leads me to repentance also leads me to His love in my limited understanding. He understands the hard, and He doesn’t hurry the holy.

As we’ve now rounded the corner into 2026, the Wilderness: Phase 1 seems to be coming to a close. Maybe. And even if so, there will be more phases. More questions. More seasons of stillness. More seasons of waiting. And if we learn to wait in the wilderness, we just might learn how to wait in the promise land. Because I know this for a fact- we will squander in the promise land what we mishandle in the wilderness. Just read the book of Exodus. The Isrealites did not step foot into the promise land and automatically get everything right. On the contrary, they continued facing the same struggles and battles they faced in the wilderness becasue they did not surrender to what God was teaching them there. And friends, God doesn’t change His mind about the lesson He wants us to learn just because we don’t get it on the first try. He’s not condemning us for failure, but He is going to give the same lesson over and over until we understand and apply it. That’s not mean of Him; it’s merciful. Because if He just passed on to the next lesson or the next phase without us mastering the current one, we’d have no chance at success then either. The things God teaches us compound on each other. If He hadn’t taught me to sit in stillness and to lean in to His presence to hear His voice, then I would still be trying to hurry the holy He’s wanting to produce in me now and in future seasons. I heard a quote just last night that says, “Success before men has a different reward than success before God. Success is obedience, not growth.” Success is so very different before people than before God. We think success can be seen, measured, counted, and squashed into a statistic to proclaim to the world… but God thinks success is obedience. And sometimes, oftentimes even, obedience isn’t measurable by the world’s standards. His version of success is showing up, sitting down, and waiting. Things that don’t really get any recognition from the world. Growth to the world is production-centered: having more, being better/faster, etc. But growth with God is a slow and steady process. A process that no one gets to escape.

If the pressure of the new year has you yearning for success, make sure you have God’s definition in mind. Make sure that you don’t just want to measure “growth” to show others, but rather sit with the Lord to see what He has in store for your life this year. As I said earlier, He stands outside of time. That’s why He isn’t in a hurry, and it’s why He doesn’t hurry us. When metal is put through fire to be refined, it doesn’t ever come out perfectly ready to be used on the first time. It has to go through the furnace over and over until all the dross and imperfections are burned away so that it can be used for its intended purpose. The same is true for us.

May we war from His rest; may we serve from His rest; may we relish in His rest this year. Striving and surrendering are incompatible. May the words “not in a hurry” reverberate in your heart today. He’s beckoning you to come sit. Not far off, but right beside Him. Not to show Him what you have done, but just to be with Him. The still and slow He may be wanting to bring you into is far, far more valuable than anything you can produce for Him. He’s not going to check for your badge of busyness; He’s going to ask you to behold Him. Because when you behold Him, everything else that seemed so important and so urgent fade away. When you behold Him, you’re not in a hurry. And neither is He. Don’t hurry what’s holy. ❤️

May this song be the soundtrack to your beholding today.

https://youtu.be/eL92-dvgmvU